It’s All a Joke…

mayor-damien-protection-squad:

ironwoman359:

I’ve seen a lot of this scene from Darkiplier’s point of view, but I’ve not really seen any from Warfstache’s. And I’m having Warfstache feels tonight, so I wrote this. I’m sorry. Enjoy. ( @colonel-william-protection-army , @mayor-damien-protection-squad , @ego-protection-squad )

William sat in the foyer, holding Damien’s cane. He had searched the whole manor, but to no avail. Celine was gone. So was Damien. The cane had been the only trace of either of them he could find, and clutched it now like a lifeline. He glanced over at Y/N’s body, which lay broken and unmoving on the marble floor. He sighed, and put his head in his hands. How could this have happened?
Where did it all go so wrong?
A noise caught his attention, and he looked up, shocked to see Y/N slowly getting to their feet with their back to him. He sat up, confused. How were they…
They turned toward him, and reeled back in surprise…in fear.
“Oh no, no! It’s ok,” William reassured, standing and holding out his hand. He stared at them in wonder as they regarded him, a strange look on their face.
“I thought you were dead.” A slight smile spread across his face, and he moved towards them, but they backed away again.
“I-I mean, of course you’re not dead,” he continued, and his smile grew. “You’re not- how could you be dead? I-I wouldn’t have killed you!” He laughed a short, strangled laugh. “I-I didn’t kill you!”
Y/N didn’t speak, they just stood there staring at him, an unreadable expression fixed on their face.  
“I mean of cour-…I-I mean…of course…” William set Damien’s cane down on an end table, and let out another choked laugh. “I didn’t kill anybody. I-” He laughed out loud then, realization hitting him like a ton of bricks.
“It was all a JOKE!” He laughed again, a sense of relief rushing through his entire body.  “Of COURSE, it was all a joke!” He turned back to Y/N, who still wasn’t laughing for some reason.
“Were you in on this?” William asked, shaking his head. “Did Damien put you up to this? Of course he did. Damien, where are you, you rapscallion?” he called out, stumbling out of the foyer back into the manor.
“Where are you? Celine? Oh, it’s time to come out now! It was good, it was good, you almost had me.” He laughed again, waiting for his friends to answer his calls. But he was met with only silence.
“Ha…haha…Celine?” he called again.

He wandered through the halls, calling out to his friends, but they still wouldn’t answer him.
“You guys are really taking this seriously, aren’t you?” he laughed. “But it’s no good, I figured you out! Where are you?”

“….where are you?”

A hand reached out from behind, and touched his shoulder. He whirled around, and for a moment, his face lit up.
“Damien?”
But no, it wasn’t Damien. The man standing before him was…grayer, somehow. He was holding Damien’s cane, and was looking at William with an expression that fell somewhere in between rage and pity.
William laughed.
“You can’t fool me forever, you know. Where are they? Where’s Damien? Where’s Celine?”
Something stirred on the figure’s face for a moment, but his features quickly hardened.
“They’re gone.”
“No.” William laughed again, shaking his head. “No, you don’t get it. They’re just playing a joke on me. Damien’s probably laughing his ass off somewhere…DAMIEN! CELINE! WHERE ARE YOU???” 
William’s shoulders were shaking now, and he couldn’t tell if he was laughing or crying. The gray man reached his hand out toward’s him for a moment, but stopped before he actually touched him. His movements were stiff and jerky, as if he couldn’t make up his mind on what limb to move when. 
“It’s not a joke, Colonel,” he said quietly.  
William kept laughing, tears streaming down his face. 
“Nonononono, it’s a joke. It has to be a joke, it has to be…” His insides felt hollow, emptied out of everything but pain. It had to be a joke.
“Colonel?”
He was definitely crying now, his laughs turning into strangled sobs and gasps for air. It had to be a joke, right? It had to be….

“COLONEL!” The gray man seemed to be at a loss for what to do. Then, he flickered, and a red aura reached it’s tendrils out towards the colonel, pushing the gray away.
“Will…?” it asked, sounding unsure of the word coming from his own mouth.
Will stopped sobbing, and looked up at the gray man.
“Will?” he repeated. It sounded so familiar. “Will. Will. She…she preferred to call me Will. Preferred Will. Preferred Will, preferredwillpreferredwill…Wilford…? Wilford!” He laughed maniacally, throwing his head back and roaring towards the ceiling. “Wilford! Such a funny name! Wilford! Is that my name? Yes…yes it must be. Wilford…”
The red aura reeled back from Will’s display, a horrified expression crossing the man’s face. 
Wilford laughed again, pointing at the gray man. 
“You look like you’ve seen a ghost! What are you doing here, anyway? What are you-” he stopped, and frowned slightly. “What am I doing here? Why is Wilford here?” 
“Well…” the figure paused, mulling over its words. “It doesn’t matter,” he eventually said, shaking his head. “We need to go.” 
“Go? I’m not going anywhere! I need to find…I need to find someone…am I looking for someone?” Wilford looked around, trying to make sense of his surroundings. He was sure he had been here before…but when? Why? “I don’t even know your name…”
“It’s…” the man paused, thinking. “It’s Darkiplier,” he said, sounding the word out slowly. 
Wilford giggled. 
“Well now I know your name! It sounds familiar.” He paused. “Do I know you?” he asked, cocking his head to the side.
Darkiplier’s grey aura was punctured by a layer of red and blue at once. 
“Yes…Wilford.” His voice was rich and layered, as if multiple people were speaking in unison. “You know me.”
“Fabulous!” Wilford said cheerfully. “Now, we’ve gotta go! We have to go look for them outside!” 
“Look for who, Will?” Darkiplier asked carefully. 
Wilford frowned slightly. 
“I don’t know.” He shrugged, and grinned. “Guess I’ll know them when I see them!” He bounded out the front door into the morning sunlight. Darkiplier watched him go, then looked down at the cane in his hand. 
“Maybe you will, Wilford,” He said to himself. “Maybe you will.”

ISNFKEE IM EATING LUNCH- I DONT NEED THE FEELZ TM RN. YOURE AN AMAZING WRITER! BUT NOW IM SAD -SAD Mod KT