Shae and I went to Raging Rivers the other day, and we happened upon this little headcanon of cuteness. Enjoy.
Scout – Since he can’t swim, he’d spend the entire time hitting on the hot single women in bikinis. At least once he’d start hitting on a taken woman and get thrown in the pool. Sniper would have to fish him out.
Soldier – Would be in the wave pool, constantly getting whistled at by the lifeguard because he and Demo won’t stop wrestling and roughhousing.
Pyro – Splashing around in the children’s section, wearing water wings, a duckie floaty ring, and goggles with a snorkle.
Demo – Getting drunk and roughhousing with Soldier in the wave pool. Heavy occasionally convinces him to go down the water slides with him.
Heavy – Keeps going down all the different water slides and raft rides.
Engineer – Dunking his feet in the water and watching Pyro play in the children’s pool, keeping him out of trouble.
Sniper – Is a literal fish. Gets into the wave pool and doesn’t come out for several hours.
Medic – Refuses to get in the water at first, petulantly sitting on the sidelines with a book. He slathers himself in sunscreen because as soon as he steps into the sun, he’s practically bacon. Only gets in after lots of gentle persuasion from Heavy.
Spy – Catching a smoke in the parking lot because the park itself is nonsmoking. Once he’s back, Sniper manages to drag him into the pool. He crawls out looking like a wet cat.
Miss Pauling – Playing mommy, making sure all the mercs don’t tear the place down before they leave. Buys them all lunch at the snack bar. Has to bribe Sniper out of the pool at the end of the day, despite numerous refusals and him insisting that he lives there now.
The Mercs at the Water Park
Published
A Glitch Named Anti 